I was sitting with my brother discussing the drama that may result from such things as a one night stand, a date and even a not so serious relationship.
In a sarcastic way, we have come up with a set of rules that we thought a man should have handy at all times if only in his head…
For most times we wish we had a set of rules to lay down as though we truly are kings, at least kings of our own castles…
Thus we began with rules in a man’s head, a funny representation of the unsaid though thought of perhaps many a time.
We began with some rules that should be laid down concerning a one night affair.
Of course, we thought, it would be nice if one can place a little alarm clock under her pillow should she decide to stay the night and hence upon the ringing of the chime she would awaken to the rules….
So here is what we came up with, to be taken comically and not seriously I would hope.
Surely these rules can also be applied in reverse, should the woman act like the man of the house or the ruling queen of the invaded castle…
The rules of ShagNQuit:
Upon the hearing of the chime, rules must be adhered to as set
here-forth as the rules of this castle:
If by chance you wake to see daylight, please vacate the premises Immediately.
Never attempt to wake His Highness.
Breakfast shall never be served, period.
Please collect all evidence of your stay and discard in the outside garbage bin.
Never attempt to contact His Highness, beyond this encounter. Any further contact shall be made by his majesty.
There must be a minimum of two week period before the next shag IF desired by His Highness.
We are sure you enjoyed your short stay and the pleasure was all yours…
Thank you for visiting the Cockpit of Air Highness!
written in association with
hung li-git (aka legit)
hung lao-xi (aka lousy)
Alternatively, there are also rules when someone invites you over for a get together or a party and so on… We have called these
Rules of the drink host:
Should His Highness ever invite you over for a drink, acceptance is mandatory.
Always bring His Highness a nice bottle of scotch regardless of what you drink.
Plenty of refreshments will be provided by you, please make sure His Highness’ glass is always full.
An invitation is by no means a contract to a shag.
A Shag requested by His Highness on the other hand is mandatory.
Please treat the castle in regards to cleanliness only, as though it were yours.
Upon the last tune, please make sure you do not find yourself lounging on couches.
Whence His Highness is no longer in sight, please find your way to the exit door, promptly.
Do not attempt to make a toast unless you are boasting about His Highness.
If by chance thy hands are full and a toast is proposed by His Highness your glass must be raised using one or another of your limbs.
Vacate the lavatory immediately regardless of your position, should His Highness attempt to open the door.
No fornication is to be allowed on the premises unless it includes His Highness.
Thank you for accepting the terms and conditions of the drink invitation.
Men! What do you say to that?
Women! Try to laugh!
TO BE CONTINUED…